07:03 AM. On a Friday. Lomita, CA
On my way to work (yesterday) I was starving and decided to stop by Jay's Donuts for a tasty morning treat. I pulled into the crowded parking lot, eager to meet my soon-to-be-consumed baked good. The air was so thick with sugar that I took in a deep breath and exhaled cotton candy. I purchased my tasty treat, along with a cup of hot, cheap joe (I'm talking about coffee, not a gay prostitute). With items in hand, I started walking briskly towards my chariot. Unfortunately, my sweet jaunt was quickly interrupted when the ground gave way under my heels and I was assaulted by a blanket of blacktop. It all happened so fast, yet it seemed to also be in slow motion. I lurched forward, with both hands and a knee breaking my fall. The palms of my hands and my right knee were skinned up pretty good, but somehow my left leg wasn't hurt at all. I figure it must have separated from my body during the fall, and returned to its rightful place after the danger had passed. Smart thinking left leg!Sadly, my coffee, once held tenderly in my hand, went spilling to the ground as I fell victim to gravity's evil scheme. The donut went crashing down almost simultaneously, and landed in the puddle of what was to be my morning buzz. I sat stunned; I don't fall! I'm too old to fall, I thought—only children fall. Soon the reality set in as I realized a handful of old gentlemen had stopped talking about the price of pork to ask me, "Are you okay?" I answered, "Yes," but in all honesty it took a lot to keep the tears in. I pulled the pile of my body up, grabbed the empty cup of joe and soggy donut, and walked to the trash can to throw away the tasty fallen soldiers.
In case you're wondering, I did not return to the shop for a replacement donut and cup of coffee. For one, I was much too proud (and embarrassed) to show my tear-filled eyes to the stunned (holding in laughter) crowd. Secondly, I figured that the fall was karma's way of telling me, "You shouldn't be eating a fecking donut for breakfast—oatmeal is much healthier!" I agree with karma; however, there are no oatmeal shops on my way to work.
posted by Anonymous @ 11:12 AM
4 Comments:
Oh! You made your poor big sister tear up with thinking of her little sis in a harsh world of asphalt, coffee and sugar glaze.
That is so sad and funnily written at the same time. And yes it's o.k. to cry over spilt coffee
It realy is okay to cry in those situations. Why just a few weeks ago, I'd had a thoroughly rotten day and told myself "don't worry, get through this day and after we'll have a strawberry shake from Del-Taco!" When I finally pulled up to their drive-thru, a heavy Hispanic accent told me coldly and carelessly that "the shake machine ess broken. No shakes" Well, you can bet I pulled away from the window and burst into tears. And I didn't even skin my knees! You poor dear! I will buy you a big, fat doughnut when I'm in town and will hold your arm preventing a fall of any kind.
aww, im pretty sure Beauty That Moves fell outside a coffee shop recently (sorta). you guys can have a support group.
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