Motherhussy

Dexter's Laboratory

Hello, and welcome back to my life!

So to fill you in, I did decide to see my therapist on Friday. The session actually went amazingly well. One word of advice for anyone starting therapy: You have to talk! You are paying this man/woman big bucks to help you, and if you don't tell them what is wrong--then they won't know how to help you. They are trained professionals, not mind readers. That would be cool if they were mind readers though, well at least until they found out my evil plan to destroy the WORLD!

But I digress, I just thought I would let you know things went well and I'm going back to see the little red-head after a 4-week hiatus (have to take the boys to Utah to see their Old Man).

In addition to visiting my therapist, the family and I took a weekend road trip to Fresno, CA. Fresno is not all that cool. It's a city, with buildings, and a college, and some trees, and people. My point being, Fresno is a place to visit--but I wouldn't want to live there. I think Fresno's city motto should be something like,

"Fresno! The only reason you're here is to see your family."
or
"Fresno! Move on, there's nothing to see here."
or
"Fresno! If we weren't in California then we would be just another lame city."
or
"Fresno! No--we don't have a beach."

I could go on and on with this delightful game, but I digress. The reason we went to Fresno was to see my new nephew, Dexter, (yes, Dexter is his name--I think his parents let his 5-year-old brother name him) blessed. Now Dexter is darling. He is your typical, tiny, cute, freaked-out at the world, little person. We love him, of course. Well Cody and Colton have always loved babies. I mean, they L-O-V-E babies, and since Dexter's birth that love has been even more acute (or: “Awwww, cute!”).

On our drive up to Fresno the topic of babies came up, as it quite frequently does with Cody and Colton.

Cody asked Anthony, "Dad, why don't you and Mom have a baby girl? Or a baby boy. We want a little brother or sister."

Anthony (the optimist and the one that doesn't have the burden of a womb) replied, "Well, maybe we could have both someday."

Cody, hesitant--yet happy, responded, "Well, okay, but the baby would look pretty weird when it was naked."

Cody darling, that was not what your Dad meant by having a both a boy and girl baby. I don't think that it would please anyone in our family if I gave birth to a hermaphrodite. As a matter of fact, I think it would be down right creepy. What Dad meant was that maybe, some day (depending on my reproductive organs and genetics) we could have--SEPERATELY--a boy baby and a girl baby. Not a baby with the sex organs of a male and female. Are we clear?

So, that was my child’s first official lesson in hermaphrodites. I think I learned about them my freshmen year in High School, with worms. Those were simpler times.

Anyway, Dexter, we’re glad that you only have one set of reproductive organs and we love you—even if you are named after a popular Cartoon Network© production.

posted by Anonymous @ 11:48 AM